My Ideals and Feelings

Once again, I went to visit some getai.Hoping I could enjoy some music from the chinese and dialects. However, I didn't realise that the whole shows have been postponed to the next two days. I felt disappointed. I just wish to be better in my social skills, and not live in my own world. I wish to be more concerned about people.Hope to develop on my current hobbies and make new friends along the way.
Someone advised me that I should go to new environments, different places.

It was a silly thought that I would love to explore places like gay clubs and lesbian clubs. Probably, I were trying to understand people.

I would be reading up widely for fashion stuffs these days. I think someone gave me hope that she could hand made her clothes, pants and skirts. I wish to learn such skills too. There were skirts I like and I wore them. I took and showed the designs to a tailor. There were supplies of textiles of clothes we bought in the beginning of the year. I hope to have different sides of my personalities with different styles of outfits. I felt a great feelings to show drawings and ideas to one lady and a few of my others friends.

I do wished to have finance knowledges, like accountings and even forex. 

It gave me courages to face back some past assignments which had given me for certian times. Logos design and namecards too.

My feelings are in a mess. Damn. I just feel that guys could not be trusted after all.I got a feelings I were a fool most of the times.Never mind, I would treat it as a lesson learn. I had myself to blame.Never trust anyone easily.I just feel they don't be bother with me and care about me.Give me at least three years, I would want to put concentration on myself and not on others, or even guys. I got really disappointed from last year till now.

It would be a good acknowledge to myself I couldn't handle relationships well. Then I should focused on businesses plans, events, and ideas.The excitemnents of earnings enough and reaching up to my goals let me regain my spirits once again.Though I were still unsure the greatness and beneficial results I could see.I should feel gratitudes to these three people. One of them still remember me as his friend. I realised I do have distant friends I should keep in contact with often. I am glad I gave him hope despite his own personal struggles. I saw people doing surveys. I wished to know about the markets to do flea markets.

 Also I would be looking forward to be in the classroom with friends at a music school, lee wei song.Probably I hope to observe myself to relax and be in a dancing environments, vocals singings and keyboards playings. I would find people who enjoys the presence me and my accompanies.

I were more concerned about food, multivitamins, vitamins B and black soya bean.I have been collecting articles and receipts on food.

Another thought

看得懂,看得,遮挡,暗示,

演示

因为一但没有了利用价值，全部努力都会被遗忘。
现实生活中，还是现实点。
百面具人看得多，
生活反而虚假，也特别的厌倦。
恶心,会成为第二个 。。
好人难做
只要有事情, 有乐趣...找你,找你



有时在街上走走看看，对着内心坦诚，反省反省。。。
你对这个人是纯粹的友谊，一起分享喜悦或悲伤，还是只是一位利用工具（大道利益或金钱）而已？？？

自私还是还是切磋的意思: (All is trying to get hold of some of the curiosity /the informations, their queries to their own paths?) Are they mainly out of their concerns?

I rather get hurt by my enemies rather than my closest friends?which I think I feel it?The people you try to help but in the end hurts you that bad.I am not afraid of being alone most of the time, but I were afraid of three meals that cannot be handle well.Dreaming of lifestyles that I long for.

还是觉得惭愧吧。。。
因为傻瓜不傻，它们也只是单纯而已。。。

Origamis Making

I feel that anger or anxious that transformed into some useful energies would be great.While waiting for someone, I am quite a little annoyed by myself and the person. I try to compromise between these people. I am the middle person afterall. At least, I did somethings meaningful. I learnt from some lessons,move forward to look for more people to be in my life.Seriously I couldn't sleep at this hours.Phone is not working that well. I wish to read up more on stuffs, E-commerces, internet and stuffs.
I saw some boxes, some of the animals creatures being made.This is really gives me happiness. The illusions of moving objects like the boxes. The tick toppings of the toys objects. The Domino effects that people apply in the casinoes.I wish to be out of the rat races, don't wish to be always falling behind or apart.
Lets rock the world!!! Enough of all the guilt, the shame, the anxious, the jealously, the unstopping feelings inside me, the left behind. Though I knew how people works or even people who like to pull you down from reaching there.
I wished to attended my physical exams this October to come. Hope to have some teaching experiences. I wished to be more having the trying spirits.  
I have tried to look for solutions, probably it is in me. I am like the events organisers. I would marked the date of 3 November 2013 12.30am to 12.00pm. Nike we run SG 2013.
I am the one who asked people out. It is really trying my patiences.I would give time to go into the society to experiences the life :P

Follow the plan, follow the system,

It is agian reality just slaps on my face. All these days or months I have been with these people, once their HR have been up, I try to contact any of them, it seems uncontactable. I wish to contact those people, ask them out, it seems they are nowhere to be found. However, It could be a bad sign or even a tell tale signs of human behaviours. Those people in my phone lists, they tried to assure that there will be a meetups. It had been the past one year, Since I last saw that few people. I choose not be on any others sides for the moments. It actually give me space to grow on my pace. Everytime, I would actually be a resourceful person, I knew I could. From places I went for social networking or to build my roads. From Orchestras, to exercise trainings, martial arts, toasmasters, BNI, 4PM, bands. i would build my energies on my achievements and my interests aand my own projects. Be more patiences. I still have places I wish to go though. I would build on my dreams rather than on people. If the people are along the way, then we shall be part of our journeys. I came to places just to seek for companionships or to see if people can be a team with me or I could be in their teams. Team spirits are stronger than any forms. Too much sorrows, heartaches I felt. Even if you laugh the loudest, it would be be crying inside. Came to the question on building long term friendships, common goal, common dream? Are friendships and business partners build just because you are on the good days and happy hours? If they are bad terms, would we be kenna bad-mouth. Actually i should not have demands on people, outsiders. When in a family or with relatives, I already seen that those who are blood-related have already gives you a black face, or choose to be in their silent mood with you. Some already foresake you.

Successful people will only tell me to replicate simple things. And it's true. Can we really withstand with the rich people? Follow the plan, follow the system. I knew I had not been following the plans and systems, thats why I ended up like that. Have I let people mistrust me due to my neligiences? I feel I got to handle myself well enough. Come to think of that, are we comrades or sisterhoods or even brotherhoods when we are in the same religions. Only those have done well, then they have more responsibilities. You knew me well enough, there lies my hurts. Those regimentation one have to follow. I got to learn to be more obedient. I wish to have more buddies that can be there. Afterall, I don't have the wealth yet. I am cultivating my mind, my body and my spirits. 

I knew some people had try to be with me, by my side, always to guide me. Despite it is not the person's wish to actually be there, the person had try to rush down to present some stuffs to me. I knew the person is not interested in the activity. The person might be involved in others activities, or others programmes the person wanted to earn it's livings.

People who had the common goals, be it the religions, the workplaces, to be in the corporate ladders. I am still at the bottom, be it at the workplaces, religions.

Flea Market

We set up our own booths. Do we have financial intelligence? I am going to read up more. What could I have done to be better in these booths set-ups. Could I solve the issues? Is there any thing I could do on the products. Bookmarks, Notespad? The rules not to get the loss but to actually create incomes out of passions. How should I work for the process so that I can gain some incomes?

Continuously I work for two days on the weekends basics. Would I actually be able to work continuously three days from morning 10am till 1plus? Or even three different working places to work in a week. 

oh lantern festival is coming. I should arrange and gather friends together.

I am going to read up on books to develop myself.
I read a newspaper articles on copyright has role in promoting creativity.
Are creative people motivated by economic incentives to create new works of literature, it would be wrong to think that copyright has no role in promoting creativity today. Do any products have to suit the market needs, be it the music, arts, food, writings too? Also to think of the costings too. who could be my good friends:P I think it would be my books, music, arts , food ;P Time to focus on tomorrow:P
Supposedly I have to go for some lessons teachings. However, I feel sleepy. Also, How would I be better in self-disclipines :P

Dilemma

Sometimes, I feel neglected y this world and being push around.Probably I should have forge a better bonds with people. I don't seem get lots of help.The only help I could get is from old friends. I just wish to expand my lifes , besides knowing religions people. I like to know people in the interests groups, singing, baking, or others.The only way to establish more friendships is to equip yourself with skills, only way to survive with a country here. I don't wish to be stuck with the little social skills I got.
Maybe I wish to know more buddies friends.i have being working quite a while.Really hope to have more colleagues friends.
Is it a good decisions to work in the army forces, army careers? I feel that it might not be a bad choice.I hope my health can endure and I wouldn't need to care about others stuffs for these two years. If I really hope to venture in others fields,arts, businesses? The only thing I could do was to put it in the evenings.
Have I unlock the soul in my heart? I wished to understand too. I wished to be a welcoming person too that people found it interesting to be with.
Being a coordinator, a middle person is not an easy task. I got to pick up, not being pushed around. I got to do my own stuffs too. I also wish I could do handicrafts the whole packaging.I want to care my well-beings rather than put others first before me.Why should I help when I couldn't really help myself.?

Lets Never stop falling in love

I wish a falling star could fall forever
And sparkle through the clouds and stormy weather
And in the darkness of the night
The star would shine a glimmering light
And hover above our love

Please hold me close and whisper that you love me
And promise that your dreams are only of me
When you are near, everything?s clear
Earth is a beautiful heaven
Always I hope that we follow the star
And be forever floating above

I know a falling star can?t fall forever
But let?s never stop falling in love

When you are near, everything?s clear
Earth is a beautiful heaven
Always I hope that we shine like the star
And be forever floating above

I know a falling star can?t fall forever
And let?s never stop falling in love
No let?s never stop falling in love

Soul Mate

Sometimes, I wonder and think. I knew certain places I should not have gone to. Why would fate allow me to be in this situations? I mean I am learning about taking care of my health. I don't expect to be caught in a dilemma state. I mean I would hope to not to go to the further state. That the past generations have gone through. They encountered people of certain industries acted on certain behaviours.
Environments changed a person's mindsets and the way the people speak after they have their reflections of speech done.However, the good thing about this environments are the people are postive. You can feel the positive energies in there. It still give hopes to people who are still struggling to meet its ends in life. The people from another places I encountered actually seem agressive in their selling strategies. I received personal posts. Oh well, Will I become one of them one day once I actually carry on doing certain stuffs. Who should I put close to and be trusted? The quiet ones or the talkatives ones. I have understand others environments would not be as aggressive as it seems.
The people listen to their leaders and not act upon things the leaders did not mentioned them not to do. competitions are still there afterall, we could have been sitting besides each others. I acknowledge the person's presences, the others parties doesn't acknowledges my presences as the others parties have been listening attentively to the talks. I knew the person have been eyes peeking on my notes? Have I becoming that sensitive. I knew my instincts work this way. Have people becomes that selfish to guard theirselves and not even exchanges the numbers due not to invite any inconveniences. Well, I see it as a respect earn and also feel a sense of coldness and sweat coming out. Afterall, business still have its business policies. Be it in schools, in work, in religions,  Everyone strikes to bring out their best performances and results. They wish to be able to secure a place, a recognition, a postion in the corporate ladders industries.
When I understand the things that it works. I felt that life is still practical afterall. People came to you only they are looking somethings in you. They would not pick up your calls. in the first place, I am providing them a resouce, then I have to abide to their requests. Don't you think that I don't have a power to say NO to them. I wish the teamspirits will be there. However, I think likewise now. I groom on myself first. Who want to care about the others parties and give the time to them?Only we have the same common goals or our interests are met. Only the time spent together in an activity, then the person would talk to you and discuss your issues. what kinda of attitudes is this? These people are independent in their thoughts and the things they hope to project out to their customers. Fine, I would care much on my own growth developments in the stuffs I hope to come out too. Nah, I shouldn't be sentimentals afterall.
 I mean one would ask you on certain places they wanted to learn their skills, for them to have the same business mindsets. However, once these fufillments are met, they would still part on and continue to their main journeys in life. Then it just leave me there to ponder, why in the first place I bother and have to provide for them. Probably, All that goes around comes around. I might wish people would also provide me a hand, like open the key to the things I hope to know. I found that this had been a year that I take and give at the same time. People gave me comments after they see my posts on certain topics. It could be good as someone share their ideas with me.
For people to give me comments after seeing my posts, I am inviting people to start a conversation though I do not know the person's age.  They are strangers.
Once seeing my posts, people would like to attend certain sessions with me, I think it can be a good start for having like minded people to join together activites. Still I got to be on my guards as I knew that I wouldn't know things that I done they would accept a not?
I should be studying but I feel putting some personal thoughts here would let me able to continue my journeys to my books.
What about between friends and strangers? Friends who know you for a few years start not to celebrate your birthdays? Or strangers who want to become your friends and know you more? Or even long lost friends hope for a reunion ;P Friends who actually attended sessions of meetings who you known for two or more years that doesn't seem to be the ones celebrating. Nah, I think every meet ups for three sessions would be enough?
After all these sayings, Do you think ladies and guys could be soul mates after all. I personally feel it doesn't exists. Cause there would lies a personal boundaries one needed to be guarded. If the opposite genders are more dominant, it seems it could control the others parties.
Here comes a post by my new known friend:
My Soul Mate of another version: Is A relationship of 2 Adults without constrain of their sexual perference. It must be played in a society of people as 2 persons marooned in an deserted island is discounted.
SM is combined into 3 tenets which each are equally strong in expression in demand and each guards its position tenaciously.
A) Physical B) Emotion... C) Mental D) Spiritual sic sublime. If either domiantes, the relationship will fail. One party only have to indicate, the other party understands without recourse of anticipation and act. Or acknowledge the expression.